Zimbabwe Absurdity

I got into work this morning to find a request for money on my desk. This particular request happens once a year and is from the local branch of the ZANU-PF (ruling party) so that the party faithful can celebrate Independence Day on the 18th. In the past I have managed to be out when they came calling for the money and though I cannot guarantee that I will be out this year I have no intention of donating a thing. There are several things that make this year’s request a bit different:
1. It is from a white farmer (whites are not traditional supporters of ZANU-PF) who I suspect of arse creeping in order to hold onto his farm – maybe.
2. The funds will be administered by the aforementioned farmer, maybe to give an air of respectability?
3. They have had the cheek to set a lower limit of $300000 (about US$15).
4. There is a “deadline”  of the14th April.

There is an implicit threat to the letter – give us some money or else. Obviously the “or else” is not stated but it may mean “we could make life difficult for you” or not. I certainly don’t support ZANU-PF and don’t have a membership card. I don’t belong to any political party for that matter and cannot see why they shouldn’t go and ask the party faithful for funds; isn’t that what membership is for?

Easter weekend was spent in Mozambique with friends. I have been visiting my friend Gary who works for an NGO just outside Gorongoza National Park for a few years now and every time I have been down there I have marvelled at how the Mozambican currency has gained strength against the Zim dollar. The curious thing is that on re-entering Zimbabwe I still feel like I am coming back to civilization. Mozambique is a dirty country; rubbish clogs the streets and it has an unkempt air about it. It does not help that few buildings have been painted since colonial times (1970’s) and the buildings themselves are frequently ugly – the Portuguese were heavy handed with the concrete (though some buildings must have been grand long ago). However, the street lights all work which is more than I can say for Zimbabwean towns. Markets are colourful affairs and we visited one in the local town of Gorongoza where I took the photo. The local speciality is chilli chicken and chips which can be very tasty when done properly. We sampled the local fair in Gorongoza but decided that we would not go back to the particular place that served us chilli paste complete with maggots crawling out of the jar! We survived, probably due to a lifetime of stomach conditioning in Africa!

Hopefully there will be fire but I will believe it when it happens. Tuesday and Wednesday are slated for a mass stay away and demonstrations. We have been this route before though and not much happened. But I must say that I have had several inflammatory emails from the ZCTU (Zimbabwe Congress of Trade Unions sic) calling for support and citing the Zimbabwe Students Union as saying “We are starving, we will eat your teargas!” Right. That I would like to see (from a distance). Yes, I suspect that most businesses will close and most people will “stay away”,  but other than that I am sceptical that anything of lasting importance will happen.

On Thursday I was going into the industrial sites. One can see many things for sale on the street corners; newspapers, brooms, baskets, phone cards etc. but this was the first time I have seen puppies. Yes, they were being held correctly but I couldn’t help feeling a twinge of sadness – it seems people will try to sell anything these days. Part of me wanted to stop and buy them and give them a good home but I have not got space for more dogs or even  give them to the SPCA but there they would just be put down as is their policy these days (“we cannot guarantee them a good future but we can give them a good death”). And of course it would just fuel the market which is the last thing I want to do. So they are likely doomed. Poor little guys. One of them was yawning in the way that puppies do.

Rumours abound (situation normal) but I heard a really good one on Friday from a rather dilly customer (she wanted to know if she could grow almonds in Kariba – um no, not many chill units there). Had I been watching CNN? No, I don’t have satellite TV – a reply that usually brings quizzical stares (see satellite poverty – and earlier post). Apparently the end was nigh, there were rumblings from the local military and Bob was importing some supposedly more loyal Angolan military to bolster his confidence.

Like all good rumours there are elements of truth:
1. The military IS restless.
2. There IS general restlessness in the country.
3. There IS lots of talk of the “endgame”, mainly in the international press.

While I have not checked out the CNN website, I have checked out the BBC which does have good Zimbabwe coverage and there was no mention of Angolan troops and I have not heard this one from any other sources. I did also wonder how they would get here. Overland via Zambia? I doubt the Zambians would want to get involved that way. By air (over Zambia) and into Harare? Way too risky – a “reception committee” would be easily set up and not necessarily on the ground!

Apparently there is another general stay away planned for the 2nd and 3rd of April. One of my banker customers sarcastically commented that it was to be “the final push”. Was this the 2nd or 3rd final push, I asked. Oh at least the 3rd, was the reply. We both laughed but it is not really funny. We both know what the result will be. Some small scale rioting might happen and will be crushed by the police. Most businesses will operate behind closed doors, fearful that they could lose “vital” production or be targeted by government intimidators for supporting the action. Little will change although the political temperature will climb a couple of degrees which is not a bad thing.

It does seem that Mugabe’s own government is plotting a revolt (see http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/6490805.stm) but the cynic in me suspects that it is more to do with saving their own skins than the nation’s. South Africa is at last waking up to the damage that it could cause to their World Cup ambitions in 2010 (wow, at last, thanks guys!) and they don’t want the remaining 8m (or thereabouts) piling across the border. We live in hope.

At last someone has said it! Pius Ncube, outspoken Catholic archbishop has said that Zimbabweans are cowards. I said it a little more diplomatically in my previous post; they are waiting for someone else to take action.

Yesterday I was out shopping and doing other business things. I  can only draw 1000000 Zim dollars in cash from my corporate account; that’s about US$50 at yesterday’s rate. There’s not a lot one can buy with that, especially as businesses are shying away from cheques that take 5 days or more to clear. eBanking does get around that one to some extent but you usually  need to know the company involved. I believe that the new $50000 notes are now out (US$2.50) but they have only been seen in Reserve Bank wrappers and are not in the banks. Curiously the governor of the RB is accusing the fuel suppliers of driving the exchange rate!

The exchange rate (parallel or black market for the less PC) is around 200000:1 for cash and up to 30000 for electronic. This is a jump of around 25% in less than a week. The 0’s, 3 of them, that were knocked off at the beginning of October last year are now effectively replaced. The de facto unit of currency is now back to 1000. How much is that? 234 (000). I paid 300 for that last week! I mean 300000.

Those selling currency sell only what they need to get them to the next sale. This sounds obvious but with the rate moving several percent a day there is no point in changing anything but the essential. It therefore makes it difficult to find substantial amounts as a small buyer.

Last Thursday as battles apparently raged between riot police and disaffected youth of the opposition, I was in Avondale installing software for a potential client. I was warned not to go into town but as I drove out the gate I was struck by the absence of anything untoward. No racing vehicles full of battle weary police, no chanting crowds or distant gunshots, no pall of smoke from burning barricades. Just business as usual.

In discussing the ongoing unrest with my next door neighbour she mentioned that her black staff (well educated) were seemingly waiting for someone else to  do something. I said that I thought that if the opposition did not seize the moment it would soon pass, the momentum would fade and nothing would be achieved.

It seems that this has happened and Bob has won another round. Not stupid is our Robert Gabriel. He knows that he just has to see each “event” past a few days and it all falls apart again. So on we go with the daily survival experiment. I am amazed that people who had no trouble at all picking up a weapon in what is now referred to as the Second Chimurenga (the independence war) are sitting around in a far more challenging situation just waiting for someone else to do make the changes for them. No, we should not underestimate the determination/brutality of the Mugabe government but you don’t argue with a million people on the streets. Just ask Caucescu et al.

I’m sure you’ve all come across those irritating inspirational posters; you know, the breaking wave against the sunset, the soaring eagle against the majestic sky that are supposed to inspire one to higher things. Well, yesterday we had the modern version of a tinker come around to work as he’d heard that we needed some watering cans mended. When I saw him at work I was inspired to go  and get my camera to record what could only be termed INNOVATION (picture the first I and the last N larger than the rest which is underlined). Us “Zimbos” are renowned for being resourceful but this was really an extreme version…

The tank in the background is an old fire extinguisher. It contains water and some carbide stone in a small cage under the top that is screwed down with considerable force! The carbide reacts with the water to produce acetylene mixed with the air in the tank. There is a simple clamp on the gas hose leading up to a home made nozzle. While the jet could have done with a bit more work it did an acceptable job of soldering and brazing.

I have heard of carbide lamps when we studied chemistry at school but this is the first practical application I have ever seen! Appropriate technology.

I  can remember in my 16th year that my parents gave me an allowance (I forget how much) and told me that it had to do for everything except school uniforms and don’t come back to us if you run out of money! It worked. I learnt to budget my money and get only the things I really wanted or needed.  The lesson has stuck with me for the rest of my life and to this day I am somewhat over-cautious when spending money which may be why I am still non-rich (though getting by). While I am thankful to my parents for the valuable lesson it is totally inappropriate for today’s Zimbabwe. I have to consciously force myself to get rid of money in the bank, which if the supermarket manager is right and is devaluing 4% a day, is halving in value every 18 days. When I started my business 8 years ago I anxiously watched the bank account, agonizing on every withdrawal and cheering every credit. I still am grateful for the credits but they only stay in long enough to clear and be spent. It’s very tiring.

The cosmos looks very pretty today…

Local legend has it that the cosmos in Zimbabwe made its way into the region via horse feed imported to South Africa from Argentina for the British army in Anglo-Boer war in 1901/2. I have no idea how true this is but at this time of year it is spectacular, filling the verges to roads and the edges of cultivated fields and vlei areas. I photographed this yesterday evening on the farm where I live. I certainly appreciated the beauty of it all at the end of a stressful day. Cultivated cosmos has some darker red/burgundy colours but the wild cosmos is only found in these 2 pastel shades.