NSSA and wasted time

22 04 2013

One of the larger and newer buildings in Harare is the National Social Security (pronounced NaSSA) building. It was built in the Zim dollar days so they were making a fair bit of money then. This was not difficult given that it is compulsory to give 3% of the labour force’s salary, matched by 3% from the company, in one’s employ to NSSA on a monthly basis and in those days we had a reasonably robust economy.  So given the vastly reduced income base now that there is some 90% unemployment in the country, one could forgive NSSA being overly keen to ensure that dues are paid.  But I was more than a little annoyed last week to get a phone call from one of the NSSA inspectors requesting to see the wage returns.

“Is that Mr Roberts? This is Brian from NSSA, I need to inspect your returns”.

“But I had an audit last year in December, why do you want to see them again?”

“We are doing them every 3 months. When will you be back in the office?”

I said that he would just have to wait the 2 hours or so that I was going to be in town.

On getting back to the office I produced the required documentation.

“Why are you doing inspections every 3 months?”

“It’s our policy” (meaning there is nothing I can do about it).

“Why not do it every 6 months or a year and save on time, travel and costs?”

“You will have to ask my superiors that”.

This was a blind ally so I tried a bit of information gathering instead.

“How many of you do this in Harare?”

“20”

“And do you do anything else?”

“No, this is what we do”

This sounded like a job from hell so I persisted; “How many customers do you have to see a day?”

“Oh, about 10 to 15”

“And how long have you been doing this?”

“Two years” and Brian rolled his eyes.

I was beginning to quite like this guy despite the annoyance I felt at the incredible waste of resources used in the quarterly visits. NSSA does actually pay out pensions to retired and widowed people so I guess it does fill a function. Fortunately as I am over 50 I am exempt from having to pay dues. In the past some high-profile politically “connected” farmers have point-blank refused to pay the dues and so far as I know were never brought to book. I should have put this to Brian but I had other more pressing issues to deal with.

“So I guess I will see you or a colleague in another 3 months time to look at another 3 pieces of paper”.

“Yes”, he replied, giving me a wan smile and clumped down the stairs on his way to another appointment.





Celebrating 33

17 04 2013

Tomorrow Zimbabwe will be 33. And there will be celebrations. Those cynical people who have never visited this amazing country may ask what we have to celebrate. I will answer them.

  • We have 3 big South African supermarket chains with outlets that would not look amiss in South Africa – spotting the Zimbabwean produce can be a challenge though.
  • We have  plenty of fuel at competitive prices.
  • We have the biggest fertilizer company in South Africa selling  their top quality fertilizer.
  • We  have manageable inflation. Officially it is 4.5% but it may be a little higher than that in reality.
  • 10% of the population is employed!
  • We have a stable currency (not our own) in the US dollar
  • We have the world’s best climate along with Malta.
  • We have been a democracy longer than South Africa. There is a slight financial problem in funding the next general election this year but we will make a plan for the shortfall of $100 million or so.

I mean really, with all this, who needs an economy?





Zak the Incredible!

25 03 2013

Hey, I am Zak and new around here but as I am so cute I have a blog all to myself! Check it out, it is really upbeat, witty and clever and loaded with great photos of me!

Am I cute or what!

Am I cute or what!





The pole-yard dog

22 03 2013

There’s an old song by Jim Croce (long deceased) where a character is described as being “… meaner than a junkyard dog”. I have no idea why a junkyard dog should be mean as I have never come across one. Ella, or Erra as the Shona speakers pronounce the name, is no junkyard dog. She is old, very over-weight and very gentle and I would think a Lab x Rottweiler.  I have being going to the particular pole-yard where she lives on Harare Drive for quite a few years now and she sometimes comes to say hello, her tail wagging gently.

Ella has not been badly treated at all by Zimbabwean standards but there has not been a lot of love in her life. I watched on one visit as she walked up to someone her tail wagging expectantly but he didn’t even notice her and her head sagged, her tail dropped and she walked off dejectedly to lie in the sun. So when a couple of weeks back I noticed that she was covered in ticks I decided to do what I could and bought some spot-on Frontline® tick chemical and called in on my way out-of-town. I discovered that no-one actually owns Ella but the person who took responsibility for her was genuinely pleased that I’d gone to the trouble so I showed him the container and applied the contents to Ella. It emerged that she is only fed sadza (cooked maize meal) which would account for her large girth.  There was little more I could do except keep an eye on her.

I called in yesterday on business and she was sleeping by the building that serves as an office. I couldn’t see any ticks on her and she didn’t respond to my call so I left her dreaming her old dog dreams. As I got in the truck to drive off her “owner” reached down and gave her an unselfconscious pat. She didn’t move.

An old dog dreams

An old dog dreams





The referendum – to vote or not

14 03 2013

Referenda (that’s plural of referendum)  are rare in Zimbabwe, unlike in Switzerland where they are distinctly popular. So Saturday’s referendum to accept or discard the new draft constitution should be a big deal but I am predicting the turnout will be poor.

All three of the major political parties have endorsed the draft constitution and are pushing for a yes vote so it’s pretty much fait accompli. I have had a look at the document (easily available online) but at some 88 pages of a pdf file have just cherry-picked the more pertinent points.

Despite being born here I have no birthright to Zimbabwe citizenship:

Chapter 3. Section 36

  1. Persons are Zimbabwean citizens by birth if they are born in Zimbabwe and, when they are born:
    1. either their mother or their father was a Zimbabwean citizen; or
    2. any of their grandparents was a Zimbabwean citizen by birth or descent.

    As both my parents were British I don’t qualify so I have to look under Section 38.

2. Any person who has been continuously and lawfully resident in Zimbabwe for at least ten years, whether before or after the effective date, and who satisfies the conditions prescribed by an Act of Parliament, is entitled, on application, to be registered as a Zimbabwean citizen.

Which seems to indicate that I have to apply! As I already am a citizen under the previous constitution this might not actually apply but I find it amazing that I cannot be a citizen by birth. There cannot be too many countries in the world where this applies.

The death penalty still stands which it did not in a previous version (it has been a long and tortuous path to this version).

Chapter 4. Section 48. Right to life

  1. Every person has the right to life.
  2. A law may permit the death penalty to be imposed only on a person convicted of murder committed in aggravating circumstances, and:
    1. the law must permit the court a discretion whether or not to impose the penalty;
    2. the penalty may be carried out only in accordance with a final judgment of a competent court;
    3. the penalty must not be imposed on a person:the penalty must not be imposed or carried out on a woman;  and
      1. who was less than twenty-one years old when the offence was committed;  or
      2. who is more than seventy years old;
    4. the penalty must not be imposed or carried out on a woman;  and
    5. the person sentenced must have a right to seek pardon or commutation of the penalty from the President.

    I do find it bizarre that the death penalty cannot be carried out on a woman – surely this is preferential treatment and not “equality”.

Under section 72. Rights to Agricultural Land:

  1. Where agricultural land, or any right or interest in such land, is required for a public purpose, including:
    1. settlement for agricultural or other purposes;
    2. land reorganisation, forestry, environmental conservation or the utilisation of wild life or other natural resources; or
    3. the relocation of persons dispossessed as a result of the utilisation of land for a purpose referred to in subparagraph (a) or (b);

    the land, right or interest may be compulsorily acquired by the State by notice published in the Gazette identifying the land, right or interest, whereupon the land, right or interest vests in the State with full title with effect from the date of publication of the notice.

  2. Where agricultural land, or any right or interest in such land, is compulsorily acquired for a purpose referred to in subsection (2):All agricultural land which:
    1. no compensation is payable in respect of its acquisition, except for improvements effected on it before its acquisition;
    2. no person may apply to court for the determination of any question relating to compensation, except for compensation for improvements effected on the land before its acquisition, and no court may entertain any such application; and
    3. the acquisition may not be challenged on the ground that it was discriminatory in contravention of section 56.
    1. was itemised in Schedule 7 to the former Constitution; or
    2. before the effective date, was identified in terms of section 16B(2)(a)(ii) or (iii) of the former Constitution;

    continues to be vested in the State, and no compensation is payable in respect of its acquisition except for improvements effected on it before its acquisition.

The government can still compulsorily acquire agricultural land (not urban). This is by any standard non-democratic and contrary to Chapter 1, Section 3 – Founding Values and Principles:

2. The principles of good governance, which bind the State and all institutions and agencies of government at every level, include:

  1. a multi-party democratic political system;

If this all seems heavy going – it is, so check out a summary at the kubatana website.

It is worth noting that this draft constitution has only been available to the general public without access to the internet (most of Zimbabwe) for 3 weeks when it was published as a supplement to The Herald newspaper. This is not nearly enough time to analyse and digest it to any significant degree so I must conclude that the government has a vested interest in rushing it through. Why are the other political parties, who were at the end of last year very much against this constitution, now supporting it? I have no idea what sort of deal has been cut behind closed doors to prompt this sort of U-turn.

When I dropped Shelton off at the University of Zimbabwe I asked him if he was going to vote. He paused and then said; “No. It’s fait accompli and I suspect most people will boycott it. It is very flawed”.

Will I vote? No, I don’t think so. I agree that it is fait accompli and the best way of registering my displeasure is to contribute to what I hope will be a dismal turnout.

P.S. It is now Saturday, the day of the referendum. David Colthart, the minister of Education, Arts and Culture, has just been quoted on the BBC. He said we really have no choice for if we don’t accept this less-than-perfect constitution we will revert to the truly odious previous (i.e. the current) one. David  Colthart is a lawyer by training, a constitutional lawyer no less. So I guess he has a point.  It was also remarked on the same program that adoption of the new constitution is no guarantee that it will be respected by the powers   that be.

 





Paradox

13 03 2013

As I negotiated the substantial puddle in the car park and drove off I reflected that the imaging centre was typical of the paradox that is Zimbabwe.

I hadn’t had need to be imaged for some three years when the machinery at the imaging centre was more than old and run down so this morning I was pleasantly surprised at the profusion of new equipment. A new digital X-ray machine, MRI and CAT scanner were evident. White, pristine and oozing current technology – I felt reassured that the future of medical imaging technology in Zimbabwe seemed good even if little else did. The staff was pleasant and helpful, the image intensifying dye was injected under a real-time digital X-ray (“text-book stuff” commented the radiologist – clearly delighted with his own handiwork though I suspected it also had something to do with the medical student watching) and I was soon being strapped down on the MRI bed in the “superman position” for my left wrist to be imaged. The equipment was so new that the staff admitted it was only the second wrist that they’d imaged which accounted for the false start whilst they repositioned my wrist without the CD case under it for support!

I was told on the way out that I could collect the DVD of images on Thursday to take to my doctor. Amazingly there was no charge as it was all covered by my medical aid which at $95 per month just for me is well out of the reach of most Zimbabweans. Imaging facilities do of course exist at government hospitals but tend to be basic X-rays and ultrasound and the days of free healthcare for anyone are long gone (though they did exist in the early 1980s).

It was time to get back to work and the reality of puddles and potholes in the road and no phone line because it had been stolen too many times – some 10 years ago!





The dying art of handwriting

7 03 2013

I read last year that a number of states in the USA will no longer be teaching cursive handwriting. Indeed, I have seen examples posted on the internet of students’ handwriting and it is printing – the letters are not joined. The local International School has a paper-free policy whereby all text will be stored and generated on electronic devices. I guess this does not apply to the art department!

I received the letter below today in the post (another dying institution?). It’s from my uncle in the UK who will turn 90 this year. I visited him last year and he is indeed looking old but his mind is sharp and his handwriting exquisite although I admit I find some of it a bit difficult to decipher. It is certainly better than my writing and the grand irony of that is I won the Headmaster’s Prize for Handwriting in my final year at junior school. Now I have difficulty reading it myself! I do hope that I will be as lucid as my uncle if I get to 90 even if my handwriting has long since deteriorated below his standard.

Cursive writing from a 90 year old!

Cursive writing from a 90-year-old!





In praise of parking patrols

20 02 2013
Is this the new face of normal in Kaguvi Street?

Is this the new face of normal in Kaguvi Street?

This is the notorious Kaguvi Street in the Kopje area of Harare. Once a street of touts, (well STILL a street of touts but less so) by-the-kerb car repairs, potholes and garbage. I occasionally used to drive up it just for entertainment – just how much of a traffic snarl-up it was or whom was repairing what and how many people wanted to sell me stolen bearings. I was once accused of being a racist because I didn’t want to buy some bearings.

Hello boss.
Hello.
You want some bearings?
No.
But they are very cheap.
No, I don’t need bearings.
But you haven’t hears how cheap they are!
MY CAR DOES NOT NEED BEARINGS.
But these are very good bearings, boss.
Sell them to someone else.
How many bearings do you want?
Fuck off! (Hitting brakes for driver in front stopping to chat to a mate)
You are a racist!
Well then, let’s go and discuss that with the police as racism is illegal in Zimbabwe (and they might be interested in the source of your bearings).

Tout moves off to search for easier prey.

But today it is relatively calm and no-one is doing running repairs and only one tout greets me because he apparently “knows me” but curiously doesn’t know my name. And the reason? Those Day-glo reflective vests in the picture are traffic wardens (there is one right in the centre of the picture). They have portable receipt machines and for $1 you get an hour’s parking and much less traffic that actually flows. The street is still filthy and the potholes are still there but I might actually come back for shopping! Harare City Council got this one right, now let’s see if they can follow through and clean it up.





Relics – an old tractor and the CFU

13 02 2013

Agriculture House is situated on Marlborough Drive in the suburb of the same name on the north-west of Harare. It was once the home of the Commercial Farmers’ Union (CFU), the union that in its day represented the majority of commercial farmers in Zimbabwe. It was a powerful organisation that was a thorn in the side of the government for many years. But that was a long time ago and today my footsteps echoed in the large, silent entrance hall where I’d come on anything but agricultural business. I walked around the tractor on the plinth and up the stairs to a long, dark corridor.

Yes, that is 1917 on the front of this old Fordson tractor!

Yes, that is 1917 on the front of this old Fordson tractor!

Finding the door I needed I knocked and entered. I’d come to collect a tripod mount that I’d ordered from the UK through a small company based in the building. I got chatting to the woman who’d served me. It seemed that the CFU had sold the building some months previously and now it was now administered by a government company that let out offices to anyone who had need of them. This was not a new development – the CFU had the same practice when it was there but it had been busy and bustling then.

Once the farm invasions had started the CFU membership dried up and it became a relic of its former glory. I’d been a member through my company but got fed-up with the lack of service and did not bother to renew my membership some 8 years ago. At one stage it had a very good technology section that in itself made membership worthwhile but when I phoned the Agricultural Labour Bureau up with a labour problem and was referred to the National Employment Council (a refereeing body between employer and employee) I realized it was time to go.

Walking out of the sprawling complex I wondered why the tractor had not been taken. It has 1917 on the front so it might be worth something. Now it was also just a relic of a bygone era when Zimbabwe’s agriculture industry had held the region’s respect for its farming skills and exports.





Rural visit

7 02 2013

“They didn’t pay their electricity bill” Archie replied to my question as to why the Mhangura mine had closed. I thought there may be a bit more to it than that but there was no doubt as to the impact the collapse of this copper mine in northern Zimbabwe had on the town of the same name. I’d picked up my guide, Archie, at the local GMB (Grain Marketing Board depot) for the trip into the surrounding farming area to see a customer who had problems with some seedlings he’d collected.  The GMB, once a cornerstone of the nation’s agricultural economy, was now very run down and the signpost was a hand-painted piece of metal propped up by stones at the side of the road.

It had been a long trip out of Harare on the road north-west of the capital towards Lake Kariba but I’d been interested to take a trip back to the area where I’d worked on returning from my travels abroad in 1990. Turning off at the township and GMB depot of Lions’ Den (yes, there really were lots of lions here in the early part of the 20th century!) I got onto the very quiet Mhangura road and put my foot down – there was little to miss apart from the occasional herd of cattle being driven along the side of the road. The rains had been late coming to this part of the country but the crops were still dismal – small, yellow and very uneven. This was a far cry from the area I’d known 20 years ago when the area was populated by mainly white commercial farmers.

I wasn't going fast when I took this - promise!

Long, straight and uncongested – I wasn’t going fast when I took this – promise!

Having picked up Archie we made our way east towards the Raffingora area and got chatting. Of Zambian descent he’d grown up in Harare and worked for a while as a farm manager for a number of black farmers but got fed up being given half the inputs he needed and then told to “make a plan” so he’d set himself up as a commodity broker. He didn’t go back to Zambia much but said if things got much worse in Zimbabwe he might have to.  We bumped and crashed along a truly appalling road that had clearly not seen any official maintenance for quite some time. The countryside was still beautiful despite the collapsed tobacco barns, power cables lying in the fields and the dismal maize crops clearly not suited to being grown in an area once famed for its tobacco.

It took the better part of an hour to do the 20 or so km to the customer’s farm. I dropped off Archie at the rather decrepit farm workshop area (clearly there was protocol involved here as he was definitely not invited to accompany us) and went with the farmer to the lands. Also of Zambian extraction he was an engineer by training but preferred to be a farmer. The cabbages were not in good condition, largely due to unsuitable soils so I dispensed what advice I could before collecting Archie and making our way back to Mhangura.

The bush was looking good, much better than the road!

The bush was looking good, much better than the road!

It was a long slow drive back to Harare along the congested Kariba road but I’d fuelled up with biltong from the renowned Lions’ Den Butchery which was just as good as I remembered from 20 years back. Getting back home I noticed a missed call on my cellphone from the farmer; he was just checking to see I’d got home safely. Clearly I’d made a good impression!