The lore of the lights (or a quick guide to surviving Zimbabwe’s traffic lights)

17 07 2009

Surviving Harare’s traffic lights (and by extension this applies to the rest of the country) is not to be taken lightly. Here are a few scenarios and how to deal with them.

1. The traffic pattern implies that all the lights are working. Assume nothing; traffic lights are merely suggestions and red lights are a challenge. Proceed with caution, preferably not as the first vehicle into the intersection. Let someone else be the bait.

2. The lights that you can see are working but you cannot see any others working, they probably are not. Proceed with caution, preferably not as the first vehicle into the intersection. Let someone else be the bait.

3. You cannot see ANY lights working but that does not mean that ALL lights are not working. Proceed with caution, preferably not as the first vehicle into the intersection. Let someone else be the bait.

4. You have come through at least 3 sets of lights that are not working (there was no power at home either) and it looks like this lot is out too. This IS actually the safest scenario as no-one believes they have right of way but don’t take anything for granted. Good luck and may the bravest survive. (This does not apply in South Africa where an intersection with non-functioning traffic lights must be treated like a 4-way stop street).

5. All the lights are actually flashing orange indicating a malfunction. Wow, you ARE privileged! Not many people actually see this fail-safe working so take a photo to prove it to your friends (time it for the flash!)

There are of course other combinations of the above but these are the basics. The best survival technique is to skulk in the shadow of something big enough that no-one else will “dis” it. 7 tonners are good, 30 tonners are the best.





Announcement

12 07 2009

Would all readers please note that as from February this year (2009) that all references to “dollars” in this blog refer to the United States currency of the same name. Zimbabwe dollars no longer exist. Officially they have been withdrawn due to “speculation pressure” which begs the question of how they will ever be re-introduced without the same thing happening all over again.

February has been chosen as the “cutoff” date as that is when the revenue authority is opening its books on the real money.





A grand irony

8 07 2009

“But you will only be able to use it outside the country” said Joyce.

I tried unsuccessfully to look disappointed but could only marvel at the irony. For my entire adult life I have been trying to get money out of Zimbabwe by various means and now here I was, being told that I could ONLY use the credit card for which I was applying outside the country! There will be a limit on it of course but who cares!

In another sign of the times I’d just phoned the offshore company that administers my other credit card because for some reason it had been blocked. It seems that the details had been stolen though how they knew I don’t know as there were no illegal transactions listed. I suspect that it happened when I was in South Africa in March as some outlets don’t require the user to input the PIN for the on card chip. That should lead to some interesting times for next year’s World Cup.





Mother Hubbard’s cupboard is bare

4 07 2009

Andrew is a maize breeder and a director in his own seed company which is based just down the road from my house. I was chatting to him this morning about maize yields and why the USA can achieve higher yields than Zimbabwe. He was of the opinion it was mainly due to a longer day length and better research (maize research has been largely neglected in Zimbabwe in the last 20 years) which has resulted in cultivars that perform well at very high populations. I mentioned that the article (Google UNDERSTANDING AND MANAGING CORN YIELD POTENTIAL) that I’d read on the subject indicated that highest maize yields in the USA occurred on rain-fed crops. This would never occur in Zimbabwe where the rainfall is often erratic and best yields always occur on irrigated crops.

Irrigated agriculture is de rigeur in southern Africa especially when an el Nino strikes as seems highly likely this year. This was not usually too much of a problem as up until the mid 1990’s commercial agriculture was strong and farmers were encouraged to build dams (called reservoirs elsewhere) to cope with the endemic droughts and a system of water rights for irrigation was tightly controlled. The commercial farmers are now largely gone, forcefully evicted from their farms, though the dams are still there and unused as anyone who takes a daytime flight in or out of the country can easily see. Coupled with possibly the worst maize harvest on record despite a generally good rainy season (Andrew reckoned that rural yields might reach a dismal 200kg/ha – he spends a lot of time in the rural areas) the old nursery rhyme is likely to ring starkly true.

As is usual in Zimbabwean conversation he enquired how my business was going; OK I replied, but we were not very busy largely because there was so little money out there. He commented that his company still had hundreds of tonnes of various seed with contract growers and no-one had the money to buy it. What with the government ever more desperate to grab from the pool (see previous post) the situation is unlikely to improve.

So in typical ostrich fashion I went off to the open day at Komani Microlight Club where we fly models and snapped this photo!

Boys and their toys

Boys and their toys





Desperate times

2 07 2009

It seems that the government, desperate for some revenue, has hiked the price of fuel with a 20% tax! Nothing quite like creating a bit of “real currency” inflation and give the economy a good kick in the teeth while it’s down!





Taken on trust

29 06 2009

Phil is a banker so of course I had to ask him how it was going with CABS, his employer. He admitted that very slowly things were improving but a policy change could wreck everything. I knew what he meant; I have been banking some, but definitely not all, my cash takings. I mentioned that so far I’d had no problems withdrawing whatever I needed, but yes, I was a bit apprehensive.

In the past the Reserve Bank has put limits on the amount of cash we were allowed to withdraw and on at least 2 occaisions have raided the FCAs (foreign currency accounts) of companies with failed promises to reimburse the victims. While we all have FCAs these days (well, US dollar accounts anyway) there is no guarantee that they will not raid them again – so just one minor bit of silliness from the government and the trust that keeps the banks in business would be gone – permanently!





In the pipeline

18 06 2009

Fuel is short again; specifically diesel.

The vast majority of Zimbabwe’s fuel requirements are imported by the state controlled NOCZIM (National Oil Company of Zimbabwe) whose incompetence/corruption is breathtaking. The fuel comes via pipeline from the Mozambican port of Beira (pronounced Bay-rah) some 460km away. I am not sure of the diameter of the pipeline but it must be at least 50cm or more. Whatever, there’s a lot of fuel in it at any one time. It can be a “mix” of types, separated by a device called a “pig”.

It seems that NOCZIM does not have the money to put any more fuel in at the Beira end of the pipe, so what is in the pipe cannot come out the Harare end. Why they should not have the money is open to question as the various individual importers have pre-paid for their fuel. This makes it sound suspiciously like a Ponzi Scheme (your investment is financing the previous person’s investment – just hope that someone will finance yours!).

In the past various individuals or companies have bailed NOCZIM out. We will have to wait and see if this will happen again.





This fragile life

16 06 2009

Patsy Short was the most cheerful, optimistic person I have ever met. She was passionate about animals and loved Jenni. I always enjoyed my visits to the ART Farm office where she worked as the bookkeeper and would sometimes just call in for a chat. I last saw her just before she went off to the UK to see her daughter and she was thoroughly looking forward to it.

Patsy died suddenly last week in the UK of a CVA (cerebral vascular accident). I will miss her exuberant waving every morning from her dark green Mazda as we passed on the way to our respective work.





Economic Recovery – Zimbabwe style

16 06 2009

I supposed I was not that surprised – they had only put up the price of used seedling trays 200% in a year (real money terms). I most certainly WAS annoyed! I tried everything including an impromptu economics lesson on getting higher turnover by lowering prices supermarket style and moving more stock but it was to no avail. I needed the trays and that was the price the Tobacco Research Board was charging. The sales clerk even said that these days you had to get what you could when you could; what was the point in planning for tomorrow?

On the way out I went past the propagation area just to check that the trays were indeed there. They were; scattered and piled around together with some left over tobacco plants in close proximity to the newly germinating seed.





Possibility and reality

12 06 2009

We got a pleasant surprise this week in the form of a 300000 tobacco seedling order to be sown as soon as possible. It means that I will have to get some more trays from the Tobacco Research Board but only once the deposit comes through.

Driving off to the bank to check if anything had happened I began to ponder the possibilities. Another customer was also talking about some very big orders of tomatoes and the Zimbabwe Tobacco Seed Association was wanting a sizeable order too so I was going to have to give the irrigation some thought. We have had pretty good power up until now but that could easily change and a couple more 5000 litre emergency tanks would be in order (there is a small diesel pump for them). There is an ancient but reliable Lister diesel pump at the main 125000 litre tank but it struggles to provide pressure to the far end of the nursery which we might well have to use. Maybe another Lister type engine to go the other end of the irrigation system and feed back from the emergency tanks? Then of course we have to get the water out of the ground and that would mean parking a generator right next to the borehole (some 200m from the office so the voltage drop from there would be too high) or getting a much bigger generator at the office block. Seedling medium in the form of composted pine bark is becoming a problem; the tobacco growers are also using it at this time of the year for their seedlings (methyl bromide which was being used to sterilize tobacco seed beds will not be available from next year) and supply from the one and only supplier is short. This was all quite exciting (and challenging)!

Then I got to the bank. None of the promised transfers had come through.